Thursday, April 17, 2014

What if...

My back has been hurting from a compressed fracture (caused by a metastasis) even after radiation treatment. I've been debating whether to get a procedure called kyphoplasty, which involves injecting bone cement into the vertebrae for stabilization and possible pain management. Surgery is never the optimal choice for me, even if it's minimally invasive. It's times like these that sometimes makes me wonder - What if I didn't have cancer. In my mind, I would have a brighter, happier, more active, pain-free life with unlimited potential. Alas, if only that could become reality. I have to admit that it's somewhat depressing to think about what I can't have. Perhaps it's better to think - What if I didn't even catch this cancer. Maybe everyday after I have been diagnosed is a bonus. And I hope the bonuses keep coming.

5 comments:

  1. I understand this feeling well. I miss being able to dream about the future, old age, etc. And I too am grateful for every day that I am lucky enough to survive with lung cancer, but I do miss the naïveté of taking life for granted.

    I hope you can find a solution for your back pain.
    All the best,
    Tori

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    1. Yes, I do miss that too.

      Thanks Tori. I decided on khyphplasty.

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  2. I find a bonus every time I check in and I see another post...

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  3. How did the Kyphoplasty work out for you? My husband has Stage 4 lung cancer as well that caused a compressed fracture in his spine (among others). He had the Kyphoplasty about 6 weeks ago, and has been pain free (in that area) since!

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    1. I'm so glad your husband is pain free in that area. That's really good news. I'm not quite pain free, but the pain is gradually subsiding, so I'm on the right track. Thanks for asking! :)

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